In a world where fame is as easily achievable as flashing your breasts, by flashing your breasts, Holly Madison, former flame of Playboy mogul Hugh Hefner and now reality TV celebrity, has apparently insured her jelly sacks for a mere $1million.
Boyfriends better beware.
Weighing in as the most expensive grope on the planet, a staggering $500k per fondle, per breast, Holly Madison is certainly living up to the first syllable of her surname.
Much like her English counterpart and fellow big-titted, vacuous, doll’s-head, Katie Price (aka Jordan), wherever she goes there seems to be a lot of fuss over nothing. Jordan once famously said, “some people might be famous for inventing a pencil sharpener or something, but I’m famous for my tits.”
And not too shy of her own chesty appendages (albeit augmented), Holly Madison has decided to take the unusual step of taking out a policy on hers with Lloyd’s of London, as she told People, “I’ve heard about people getting body parts insured and I thought, why not?, because if anything happened to my boobs, I’d be out for a few months and I’d probably be out a million dollars.”
“I thought I’d cover my assets.” – Which, judging by these pictures, is a first.
And there it is; that nugget of painful, sickening truth – that some air headed model and slapped up TV presenter with less intelligence than a protozoa feels her greatest assets are her breasts. No mention of brilliant mindedness, sharp wit, charisma, extensive vocabulary or sense of humour, nope, just straight up TITS.
What a sad world we live in when people become famous for having tits. If that were truly the case shouldn’t virtually every woman alive be famous? And some Texan men for that matter (Alex Jones anyone?).
And what is she going to do when her greatest assets start heading south for the winter of her life? It may be ten to ten right now but in a few years she could be facing an eight twenty crisis, and worse still; ten years from now it could be six thirty. That lack of wit, charm and charisma might seem like a good fall back when that terrible day arrives.
Luckily we live in a society which wouldn’t deprive men of their tit fix and there is a conveyor belt of young, vacuous, large breasted, low IQ girls just queueing up to be the next wank fantasy for men of equal calibre.
But for now we have Holly who is delighted to bare her globular mammary glands, along with her other Barbie-esque plastic augmentations in her unsensational TV show Peepshow which follows her around Vegas for some unknown reason as she meets some people, has incredibly uninteresting chats with them and then does some stuff in underwear.
On the subject of her overpriced fun bags Holly added, “I think it’s kind of funny. I think they’re getting the credit they deserve, they’re my primary money makers right now.”
The police meanwhile have cordoned off her head and an officer is parading around the gap between her ears with a megaphone saying, “Move along, nothing to see here.”
Have your say on Holly Madison’s insurance job on her boob job by leaving a comment.
Read about Katie Price and her new magazine, Holly’s engagement to Hugh Hefner, Hugh Hefner and Crystal Harris and Hugh Hefner and some other blonde twenty-something.
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