Chuck Norris facts to celebrate his 71st birthday with

As today is Chuck Norris’s 71st birthday I thought it only fair to share some interesting facts about the martial arts legend who made a name for himself as the hardest man in the universe during the 70’s and 80’s.

 

Norris starred alongside Bruce Lee in Way of the Dragon; the pair eventually facing off at the end of the film for an epic kung fu fisticuff which resulted in Chuck’s death. Many say that this is how he got his powers, but none refute his omnipotence.

 

So here is some food for your brain that will amaze, startle, excite, educate and inform; but mostly entertain hopefully.

 

  • Chuck Norris is so hard that diamonds seem like jelly in comparison

    There is no such thing as extinction; only species that Chuck Norris allows to live.

  • In 2003 when the US bombed Baghdad they called it ‘Operation Shock and Awe’ because ‘Chuck and Norris’ were already taken.
  • Cars stop, look and listen when Chuck Norris crosses the road.
  • If by some freakish bend in the time space continuum Chuck Norris met and fought himself, he would win.
  • Lightning never strikes Chuck Norris once, let alone twice; it wouldn’t dare.
  • Yoda correct sentence structure did use before Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to face did he receive.
  • Chuck Norris is at the centre of the universe; not a super massive blackhole.
  • Anchors have Chuck Norris tattooed on them.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a condom because there is no protection from him.
  • Chuck Norris is never late because time is relative to him.
  • The tides are not controlled by the moon; they undulate to Chuck Norris’s footsteps.
  • Wars only happen on the days Chuck Norris trims his beard.
  • Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a man so hard his legs turned into trumpets.
  • Superman wears Chuck Norris pyjamas.
  • Chuck Norris doesn’t use the force, Chuck Norris is the force.

 

Feel free to add your own Chuck Norris facts by leaving a comment.

Read about Bruce Lee’s death and a new biopic about him set for release; check out Jean Claude Van Damme’s heart attack and his denial about it.

images: mustsharejokes.com; martialnews.co.uk

 

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